Fog descends before me.
The way ahead, a foggy mist,
The path behind, a distant memory.
To fight the damp, swirling unknown is to
Move mountains with a mere command.
It is not for humans to play G-d, to enter
A dark and dangerous game
In which the winner is foretold.
Some things are meant to be,
Others wear a misty veil
Until such time as the sun
Appears, farther along the hidden road.
The unknown is part of G-d,
Its very nature clothed with wonder, permeating past,
Present, and future.
"I will be what I will be."*
The day proceeds, the fog lingers.
If I fight, to what avail?
To swat blindly a mist
That has no form, to
Challenge the very hand of G-d?
If I submit, for what purpose?
To wander blindly a road
That has no end,
To feel the damp cold of
An unknown future?
No, to submit is to be defeated, to
Fight a futile task.
To dance, to embrace the mist,
Caress the unknown, bless
The hand that gave me life,
This is to truly live.
The way ahead will never be clear,
The present often encased in fog and rain;
But in this mist,
In this existential pain,
Hope shines bright in the human soul.
For this we travel the unknown road,
For this we laugh despite the pain,
For this we embrace the mist as beautiful.
And every life that touches ours,
Every hand that holds our own,
Every soul that knows our name --
In these blessings, tangible yet
Of infinite value, G-d lives
In our world.
And in the love and hope we share,
We in turn embrace G-d.
And here, in this embrace,
We can move mountains...
* "Ehyeh-Asher-Ehyeh" (Shemot 3:14)
Monday, November 15, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
True Righteousness
Those who delight in pain
Have no place in this world.
The world of the pious, of the righteous,
This should not transcend that
Of the caring...or it means nothing.
A pious man, well-dressed, well-spoken,
Yet cruel in deed is not truly pious.
The external is important, the internal is essential.
Kindness and compassion towards a fellow human,
Refraining from harsh words,
Sharing love, not pain,
These are the ways of a tzaddik.
True righteousness is in the little things.
It is easy to play a part, to
Promenade for strangers and the many.
It is much harder to masquerade
Before a friend.
With piety comes responsibility, never the right
To bestow hurt,
To wound so deep
The soul of one who cares.
That is not piety,
That is not religion,
But only a broken shard of human weakness
That flies as an arrow
Straight to the heart.
My heart is broken, my soul cries:
Why?
Have no place in this world.
The world of the pious, of the righteous,
This should not transcend that
Of the caring...or it means nothing.
A pious man, well-dressed, well-spoken,
Yet cruel in deed is not truly pious.
The external is important, the internal is essential.
Kindness and compassion towards a fellow human,
Refraining from harsh words,
Sharing love, not pain,
These are the ways of a tzaddik.
True righteousness is in the little things.
It is easy to play a part, to
Promenade for strangers and the many.
It is much harder to masquerade
Before a friend.
With piety comes responsibility, never the right
To bestow hurt,
To wound so deep
The soul of one who cares.
That is not piety,
That is not religion,
But only a broken shard of human weakness
That flies as an arrow
Straight to the heart.
My heart is broken, my soul cries:
Why?
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Nectarines and You
Does a nectarine taste sweet because it is filled with nectar, or is nectar so called because it tastes like a nectarine?
Does it matter? Sweetness is good, no matter how it comes about. If you lose yourself too much in the details, you just might forget to enjoy what you have. Hmm, I honestly don't know where this came from, maybe I was just hungry for some nectarines ;) But anyway, remember kiddos, five servings a day of fruits and vegetables keeps a body happy. Or is it the soul that's happy? Maybe the tummy? Oh my gosh, I think I should call it a night, so layla tov from blogland!
Does it matter? Sweetness is good, no matter how it comes about. If you lose yourself too much in the details, you just might forget to enjoy what you have. Hmm, I honestly don't know where this came from, maybe I was just hungry for some nectarines ;) But anyway, remember kiddos, five servings a day of fruits and vegetables keeps a body happy. Or is it the soul that's happy? Maybe the tummy? Oh my gosh, I think I should call it a night, so layla tov from blogland!
Thursday, August 19, 2010
The cry of hunger
At night I hear their cries.
Sometimes by day as well they beg.
Whimpers, demands, supplications,
An endless hunger is what they know.
Padding softly on narrow frames, I wonder when they will disappear
Into the void from which they came.
Within there lies a heart, a soul, a wish to live and play.
Yet these hide within pure skin and bones, and soft eyes that beg without a sound;
My own eyes feel heavy, my heart cries.
Sometimes they will follow, asking their one question, all the way to my door.
If I feed them, they will return.
Perhaps not the next day, but the one after.
And the problem still remains,
The hunger devouring them inside.
What can I do?
Today there are many, tomorrow there will be more.
Only the kittens are unaware, saved by their playmates from the constant ache.
But soon they will grow.
And some would say these are only cats.
If they were dogs, would you feel the same?
And if they were people, starving on the streets?
Hunger is not a pleasant thing, and a solution is not an easy task.
From my window I see them, walking, begging, searching...
One day, may they find what they need.
***And may we all spay and neuter our pets!!! Countless lives can be saved in this way, for each animal merits shelter, food, and drink. A cold life on the street is not the answer. So if they're not going to breed, then just do the deed. Sounds harsh, but it saves lives.
Sometimes by day as well they beg.
Whimpers, demands, supplications,
An endless hunger is what they know.
Padding softly on narrow frames, I wonder when they will disappear
Into the void from which they came.
Within there lies a heart, a soul, a wish to live and play.
Yet these hide within pure skin and bones, and soft eyes that beg without a sound;
My own eyes feel heavy, my heart cries.
Sometimes they will follow, asking their one question, all the way to my door.
If I feed them, they will return.
Perhaps not the next day, but the one after.
And the problem still remains,
The hunger devouring them inside.
What can I do?
Today there are many, tomorrow there will be more.
Only the kittens are unaware, saved by their playmates from the constant ache.
But soon they will grow.
And some would say these are only cats.
If they were dogs, would you feel the same?
And if they were people, starving on the streets?
Hunger is not a pleasant thing, and a solution is not an easy task.
From my window I see them, walking, begging, searching...
One day, may they find what they need.
***And may we all spay and neuter our pets!!! Countless lives can be saved in this way, for each animal merits shelter, food, and drink. A cold life on the street is not the answer. So if they're not going to breed, then just do the deed. Sounds harsh, but it saves lives.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Strawberries
Are strawberries really made out of straw? Or is that a really southern way to say 'strong berries'? You know, they do look rather strong... :P
Monday, July 19, 2010
A Bicycle Built for Two...Not a Bowl of Pasta!
Has anyone else noticed that in America, while our wallets may be shrinking, our portion sizes certainly aren't? At restaurants today, dinner for one usually means dinner for two (one real person, yes, and one imaginary friend), and dinner for two really does let you feed your souls...with their own portions, of course! Even a single serving of salad is often large enough for two people or at the very least, one and a half. Including the half a person you're going to grow once you eat all of this food. Hmmm...maybe they were just thinking ahead? ;)
But what happened to the days of just eating what our bodies intended for us to have? In the olden days, Coke came in a little bottle (eight ounces, or twelve tops) and water was a drink of choice, steak portions really were the size of your fist, and a bowl of soup was actually a bowl of soup (and not a man-made lake of soup). This may sound funny, but I'm completely serious: it's a major problem and restaurants, advertising, and societal "norms" today are not doing much to help.
Our instincts tell us that we need to eat food. And we've learned to be polite. So when Olive Garden puts a massive plate of Ravioli in front of us, we're going to dig in. And dig in. Until we've eaten half a day's worth of food in one sitting. Believe me, I've seen this happen more often than not. And you might think that eating all this food would make us happy, but it doesn't. Not really. Look at the obesity rates in America today, a combination of sedentary lifestyles and HUGE portion sizes. Something needs to be done, and I have a solution that's easy and filled with happiness. Ok, in my world it is, but in yours you are free to form your own opinion.
Spirit Wolf's Simple 3 Step Plan
Step 1: Reduce portion sizes.
We can do this ourselves at home, but if Yogurt Mountain still continues to provide those huge "small" cups for yogurt, then we don't have to fill them all the way up. It's cheaper, and still satisfying to eat less than a full cup, no matter what their advertisements might tell you. And when a restaurant puts the world's largest veggie burger in front of you, then just eat what you feel like, and take the rest home. Or share it. What you *feel* like is the key here, because often your body will give you signals that it is full, signals that don't have to include the sudden acrobatics of a button flying through the air, liberated from your newly-expanded pants.
Step 2: Stay Active or Become Active.
This is much much much easier than it sounds. Being active includes just walking every day, taking stairs, dancing around with friends, playing with your dog, playing chase with your cat (probably more like playing where is the cat), and just moving in some way.
So again, staying active can be as simple as JUST WALKING. Walking combined with smaller portions works wonders. Don't believe me? Try it! And for older adults (and others) for whom walking might be difficult, just moving in any way is good. No matter how small the movement, it most certainly counts. But for those who can handle it, WALK! I say this with love, not as a drill instructor.
Step 3: Don't give up.
Yes, there will be times when you eat too much, when you eat the whole tub of Chocolate Ice Cream (shout out to my gram, I love you ;) , and when you don't feel like walking or moving much. That's ok, but never give up. Every day can't be perfect, but most changes don't happen overnight. We change our lives in little ways, by not giving up and believing in ourselves. Then one day, we'll wake up and be a whole new person. In comparison to where we were a year ago. I'm striving for this myself, in many ways, so I know what I'm talking about.
So basically, the next time Papa John's brings you that lovely, scrumptious large pizza, have a slice. Or two. And a delicious, healthy salad on the side. Then save or share the rest and walk away. Ha, it sounds like a plan to get out of danger, but don't worry. There is no immediate danger, just a chance for you to know even more happiness and health than you ever have before. And cold pizza tastes amazing!
But what happened to the days of just eating what our bodies intended for us to have? In the olden days, Coke came in a little bottle (eight ounces, or twelve tops) and water was a drink of choice, steak portions really were the size of your fist, and a bowl of soup was actually a bowl of soup (and not a man-made lake of soup). This may sound funny, but I'm completely serious: it's a major problem and restaurants, advertising, and societal "norms" today are not doing much to help.
Our instincts tell us that we need to eat food. And we've learned to be polite. So when Olive Garden puts a massive plate of Ravioli in front of us, we're going to dig in. And dig in. Until we've eaten half a day's worth of food in one sitting. Believe me, I've seen this happen more often than not. And you might think that eating all this food would make us happy, but it doesn't. Not really. Look at the obesity rates in America today, a combination of sedentary lifestyles and HUGE portion sizes. Something needs to be done, and I have a solution that's easy and filled with happiness. Ok, in my world it is, but in yours you are free to form your own opinion.
Spirit Wolf's Simple 3 Step Plan
Step 1: Reduce portion sizes.
We can do this ourselves at home, but if Yogurt Mountain still continues to provide those huge "small" cups for yogurt, then we don't have to fill them all the way up. It's cheaper, and still satisfying to eat less than a full cup, no matter what their advertisements might tell you. And when a restaurant puts the world's largest veggie burger in front of you, then just eat what you feel like, and take the rest home. Or share it. What you *feel* like is the key here, because often your body will give you signals that it is full, signals that don't have to include the sudden acrobatics of a button flying through the air, liberated from your newly-expanded pants.
Step 2: Stay Active or Become Active.
This is much much much easier than it sounds. Being active includes just walking every day, taking stairs, dancing around with friends, playing with your dog, playing chase with your cat (probably more like playing where is the cat), and just moving in some way.
So again, staying active can be as simple as JUST WALKING. Walking combined with smaller portions works wonders. Don't believe me? Try it! And for older adults (and others) for whom walking might be difficult, just moving in any way is good. No matter how small the movement, it most certainly counts. But for those who can handle it, WALK! I say this with love, not as a drill instructor.
Step 3: Don't give up.
Yes, there will be times when you eat too much, when you eat the whole tub of Chocolate Ice Cream (shout out to my gram, I love you ;) , and when you don't feel like walking or moving much. That's ok, but never give up. Every day can't be perfect, but most changes don't happen overnight. We change our lives in little ways, by not giving up and believing in ourselves. Then one day, we'll wake up and be a whole new person. In comparison to where we were a year ago. I'm striving for this myself, in many ways, so I know what I'm talking about.
So basically, the next time Papa John's brings you that lovely, scrumptious large pizza, have a slice. Or two. And a delicious, healthy salad on the side. Then save or share the rest and walk away. Ha, it sounds like a plan to get out of danger, but don't worry. There is no immediate danger, just a chance for you to know even more happiness and health than you ever have before. And cold pizza tastes amazing!
Sunday, July 11, 2010
What is Love? (poem and *aside*)
Real love is a rare gift.
It is more than passion,
More than friendship,
Yet these are contained within it.
It is desire and affection,
Physical and spiritual,
Attraction to body and soul.
Real love knows no age, no limit, no expiration date.
It does not fade with time, but
Grows stronger with each shared moment.
Two souls in love need not fear the years, for
Passion is strong when hearts are connected.
Love is not infatuation, not a sickness of obsessive desire.
Real love takes time; it is built with care and tears.
Heart ache is part of love, as real life can hurt.
Fantasy is pressure free, a harmless dream,
But not real.
Many hide behind such fantasies,
To protect their heart and shield off hurt.
Real love takes courage,
Because here a soul must stand alone.
There is risk of hurt, fear of pain,
But without courage there cannot be love.
Real love is a risk and life's most precious gift;
For if it is found, it is a light that lasts forever.
**As an aside:
Love can be wonderful and cruel. I've been in love myself, as many of you probably have as well. Twice, actually. And I've known heartbreak, deceit, thoughtlessness, and deep hurt. Ironically, I've never known what it feels like to have someone love you back. I mean truly love you back. But I'll share what I have learned. Real love cannot be one-sided, it cannot be rushed, but I believe it can be overlooked at first. Because in order to happen, both people need to be brave and recognize it. That's where time comes into play.
And love and insincerity do not mix. I know excessive flattery and flirty sweetness are usually meant in fun, not intending to hurt anyone. But what if the other person believes you? I speak from experience. Someone once wrote me that it was fate that brought us together, fate and music, and it scared the crap out of me. But then I chose to believe them and see them in a different way. I just wish that it had been sincere, as I later realized that it probably wasn't. Anyway, things happen, life goes on, yada yada yada.
And one more piece of advice. Please don't feel that you have to use beautiful words and over-the-top flattery or craziness to get people to like you. Don't get me wrong, craziness is cool, beautiful words are cool, and sincere flattery is great -- but you have a beautiful heart. People should like you for who you really are, and if they can't see that, then it's their problem. Just believe in yourself and be true to who you are...and if craziness ensues, then by all means go for it! Just remember that sometimes, it's ok to slow it down and put away the mask. You might even find new sides of yourself along the way.
It is more than passion,
More than friendship,
Yet these are contained within it.
It is desire and affection,
Physical and spiritual,
Attraction to body and soul.
Real love knows no age, no limit, no expiration date.
It does not fade with time, but
Grows stronger with each shared moment.
Two souls in love need not fear the years, for
Passion is strong when hearts are connected.
Love is not infatuation, not a sickness of obsessive desire.
Real love takes time; it is built with care and tears.
Heart ache is part of love, as real life can hurt.
Fantasy is pressure free, a harmless dream,
But not real.
Many hide behind such fantasies,
To protect their heart and shield off hurt.
Real love takes courage,
Because here a soul must stand alone.
There is risk of hurt, fear of pain,
But without courage there cannot be love.
Real love is a risk and life's most precious gift;
For if it is found, it is a light that lasts forever.
**As an aside:
Love can be wonderful and cruel. I've been in love myself, as many of you probably have as well. Twice, actually. And I've known heartbreak, deceit, thoughtlessness, and deep hurt. Ironically, I've never known what it feels like to have someone love you back. I mean truly love you back. But I'll share what I have learned. Real love cannot be one-sided, it cannot be rushed, but I believe it can be overlooked at first. Because in order to happen, both people need to be brave and recognize it. That's where time comes into play.
And love and insincerity do not mix. I know excessive flattery and flirty sweetness are usually meant in fun, not intending to hurt anyone. But what if the other person believes you? I speak from experience. Someone once wrote me that it was fate that brought us together, fate and music, and it scared the crap out of me. But then I chose to believe them and see them in a different way. I just wish that it had been sincere, as I later realized that it probably wasn't. Anyway, things happen, life goes on, yada yada yada.
And one more piece of advice. Please don't feel that you have to use beautiful words and over-the-top flattery or craziness to get people to like you. Don't get me wrong, craziness is cool, beautiful words are cool, and sincere flattery is great -- but you have a beautiful heart. People should like you for who you really are, and if they can't see that, then it's their problem. Just believe in yourself and be true to who you are...and if craziness ensues, then by all means go for it! Just remember that sometimes, it's ok to slow it down and put away the mask. You might even find new sides of yourself along the way.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
When Tomorrow Comes
When tomorrow comes,
Let it be for good.
No more hiding from the sun,
No more crying in the rain.
The seasons will pass,
The world will change,
And life will happen.
Be true to yourself,
Embrace the future.
Through the love and pain,
Listen to your heart,
Even when it aches.
Don't stop moving, and
If you fall, get back up.
Even if it takes many tomorrows.
Life is like a budding love,
Fragile, unsure, yet with limitless potential.
Embrace it, for each day
Is a chance to live once more.
It may not always be easy,
But the sun is that much more beautiful
After a cloudy sky.
When tomorrow comes,
Be ready.
Time is a gift and each day, a blessing.
Let it be for good.
No more hiding from the sun,
No more crying in the rain.
The seasons will pass,
The world will change,
And life will happen.
Be true to yourself,
Embrace the future.
Through the love and pain,
Listen to your heart,
Even when it aches.
Don't stop moving, and
If you fall, get back up.
Even if it takes many tomorrows.
Life is like a budding love,
Fragile, unsure, yet with limitless potential.
Embrace it, for each day
Is a chance to live once more.
It may not always be easy,
But the sun is that much more beautiful
After a cloudy sky.
When tomorrow comes,
Be ready.
Time is a gift and each day, a blessing.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Invisible walls
Invisible walls stand tall, impenetrable.
I should know.
At first glance, I may seem open, defenses down,
But come too close and I'll shut you out.
Every time.
As friends, there are no fixed boundaries, my heart is always open,
My life an open book.
But go too far, and you will hit solid glass.
So unexpected that I don't always know it's there...until I find myself hiding behind it once more.
A heart will do many things to protect itself,
Often bypassing even conscious thought.
I've seen the tears that come with "love", the abuse of power, the loss of oneself.
My heart is wary, my defenses strong.
So much so that no one has ever broken through,
Even when I first believe it otherwise.
Deep down,
I'm stuck in a fortress all my own,
Hoping for the day I can let it go,
My heart free to trust completely.
But until that day, I'll stay here,
Behind my last defenses: safe and whole.
At least as much as any one person can be.
I should know.
At first glance, I may seem open, defenses down,
But come too close and I'll shut you out.
Every time.
As friends, there are no fixed boundaries, my heart is always open,
My life an open book.
But go too far, and you will hit solid glass.
So unexpected that I don't always know it's there...until I find myself hiding behind it once more.
A heart will do many things to protect itself,
Often bypassing even conscious thought.
I've seen the tears that come with "love", the abuse of power, the loss of oneself.
My heart is wary, my defenses strong.
So much so that no one has ever broken through,
Even when I first believe it otherwise.
Deep down,
I'm stuck in a fortress all my own,
Hoping for the day I can let it go,
My heart free to trust completely.
But until that day, I'll stay here,
Behind my last defenses: safe and whole.
At least as much as any one person can be.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Character
What is character?
Sure, Phineas and Ferb, Chip and Dale, and any Disney Princess would count, but is being a character the same thing as having it?
True, every person has their own character, the set of qualities and characteristics that define them as an individual...but is there something specific we're looking for when we say, "That person has character"?
Something that sets them apart,
Something inherently good...but can you learn to "have character", or at least obtain more of it?
I believe you can.
There seems to be a moral aspect to character,
A quality of caring for others and respecting differences.
A boy takes time out for his friends in need, helps them by his presence and unconditional support; we'd say, "Oh, that boy has character."
A girl realizes that it is easier to run away from problems and challenges than to face them...yet she faces them anyway.
That is character.
Perhaps character is a heart full of pride, courage, compassion, honesty, love, action, self-control, respect, responsibility, and moderation: qualities fit for a superhero, yet unmistakably real.
None of us have all these qualities in the amounts we might prefer, but it is up to us to find the balance.
Life is about taking what we have, nurturing it, and finding our own balance.
Too much pride, love, or honesty, when forced unceasingly on others and allowed to dominate our lives and actions, is not helpful.
Likewise, an extreme lack of moderation or compassion helps no one.
Balance is life, change a gift, and life a quest to use change to find balance.
And it is along the way, when we least expect it, that we may just develop true character.
Sure, Phineas and Ferb, Chip and Dale, and any Disney Princess would count, but is being a character the same thing as having it?
True, every person has their own character, the set of qualities and characteristics that define them as an individual...but is there something specific we're looking for when we say, "That person has character"?
Something that sets them apart,
Something inherently good...but can you learn to "have character", or at least obtain more of it?
I believe you can.
There seems to be a moral aspect to character,
A quality of caring for others and respecting differences.
A boy takes time out for his friends in need, helps them by his presence and unconditional support; we'd say, "Oh, that boy has character."
A girl realizes that it is easier to run away from problems and challenges than to face them...yet she faces them anyway.
That is character.
Perhaps character is a heart full of pride, courage, compassion, honesty, love, action, self-control, respect, responsibility, and moderation: qualities fit for a superhero, yet unmistakably real.
None of us have all these qualities in the amounts we might prefer, but it is up to us to find the balance.
Life is about taking what we have, nurturing it, and finding our own balance.
Too much pride, love, or honesty, when forced unceasingly on others and allowed to dominate our lives and actions, is not helpful.
Likewise, an extreme lack of moderation or compassion helps no one.
Balance is life, change a gift, and life a quest to use change to find balance.
And it is along the way, when we least expect it, that we may just develop true character.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Tired
Her eyes speak volumes.
Barely open, head nodding, so tired.
So so tired.
She smiles, jars herself awake once more,
To a world of stress and disillusionment,
And sleep that is refused at the door.
Can she not know, can she not see that she is no hummingbird?
Yet again she's up at two.
I worry.
No one should be this tired in a waking world,
Day after day,
Always moving,
Never resting,
Perhaps escaping but PLEASE, listen,
This cannot go on forever...
Her forehead creased with worry and years,
Her tears too have left ridges there.
Rest and joy are not futile things,
But how can I help to slow her down
When years have passed, and still the same?
At night her conversations fade
As her head drops slowly upon her shoulder.
If this is seen, she is asked to leave.
And early she rises, for a bit of fun,
With flowers, doggies, and a little sun.
I worry still.
Her eyes look sad, deep inside, and tired.
Yet again the morning comes,
A chance for change.
I hope...
Barely open, head nodding, so tired.
So so tired.
She smiles, jars herself awake once more,
To a world of stress and disillusionment,
And sleep that is refused at the door.
Can she not know, can she not see that she is no hummingbird?
Yet again she's up at two.
I worry.
No one should be this tired in a waking world,
Day after day,
Always moving,
Never resting,
Perhaps escaping but PLEASE, listen,
This cannot go on forever...
Her forehead creased with worry and years,
Her tears too have left ridges there.
Rest and joy are not futile things,
But how can I help to slow her down
When years have passed, and still the same?
At night her conversations fade
As her head drops slowly upon her shoulder.
If this is seen, she is asked to leave.
And early she rises, for a bit of fun,
With flowers, doggies, and a little sun.
I worry still.
Her eyes look sad, deep inside, and tired.
Yet again the morning comes,
A chance for change.
I hope...
Monday, May 24, 2010
A Rainbow
A rainbow speaks without a sound,
A land of all colors,
Touching sky and ground.
An intangible beacon of light and hope
That appears most often right after a storm.
A bit of magic in a normal world,
It comes and goes like the breath of life.
Temporary and immortal in one,
A sign of hope, of love divine.
A land of all colors,
Touching sky and ground.
An intangible beacon of light and hope
That appears most often right after a storm.
A bit of magic in a normal world,
It comes and goes like the breath of life.
Temporary and immortal in one,
A sign of hope, of love divine.
Friday, May 14, 2010
"Happiness"
The only thing that really matters in life is being happy, so you have to figure out how to make that happen. (Unless you get happy by shooting unsuspecting people with paint balls or such, in which case please find a new happy fix!) The key word here is 'make'. Happiness is not something that's forced on you, nor is it something over which you have no control. It is a decision, a choice, and you can choose it at any time...even when it's difficult to see it through the fog. So find what makes you happy, what makes others happy, and what makes life itself happy, and you will find yourself and the meaning of it all. Well, I'm not sure about the meaning of it all part, but hey, it sounded good so let's go with it ;)
Sometimes
It is not my intention to bring anyone down on my blog, so I'll warn you that the subject matter is not pretty. It will not hurt my feelings in the least if you decide to skip this post and move on to my next one, a positive one. And I've learned that if you can end things on a positive note (like my next post and the end of this one!), then things will always look up. The sun is only that much brighter and more beautiful after a particularly dark night.
Over the past year and a half, I've posted 3 different poems like this...then taken them all down later :P I smile about it, because what else is there to do? But this one, I'm putting back up, just because it's the most current and sometimes, I just need to express my feelings. I've found that writing is a great outlet when there is no other outlet available, and it is better to get things out than to keep holding them inside. By looking them in the face, you can get past them and see what you have to do and how to make it all better. Relatively speaking, at least.
-------------------------------------------
"Sometimes"
Sometimes, I wished you would hit me.
Or her.
Anything to leave a mark, undeniable, a tribute to the pain.
Inside, my heart long broken,
My soul cries, but no one knows.
Or those that do say nothing.
I cry alone to face the silent pain.
Screams and words that kill,
Spit foaming, unseeing eyes;
This person I do not know
And soon he goes...but not forever.
Invisible scars run deep,
I've seen and felt their damage;
For her too you left no mark.
The tears, time lost, deep hurt and
Pain, these can always be explained away, but
They hurt as much as fire.
It is harder to face what you cannot see,
To heal yourself alone.
A child cries, for what she's seen and felt,
Both witness and little f*ck herself,
A worthless piece of shit with feelings
That have broken many times before.
To end this poem, I won't be harsh,
As no one is perfect in this world.
With time you've calmed,
Your heart has grown,
Yet still you sometimes lose control.
I know you try and care so much,
But it means nothing if you also strike the heart.
Words have the power to heal and love,
So please love yourself, love others, and trust.
Inside you have so much to give, so just let it go,
Whatever the 'it' is.
Over the past year and a half, I've posted 3 different poems like this...then taken them all down later :P I smile about it, because what else is there to do? But this one, I'm putting back up, just because it's the most current and sometimes, I just need to express my feelings. I've found that writing is a great outlet when there is no other outlet available, and it is better to get things out than to keep holding them inside. By looking them in the face, you can get past them and see what you have to do and how to make it all better. Relatively speaking, at least.
-------------------------------------------
"Sometimes"
Sometimes, I wished you would hit me.
Or her.
Anything to leave a mark, undeniable, a tribute to the pain.
Inside, my heart long broken,
My soul cries, but no one knows.
Or those that do say nothing.
I cry alone to face the silent pain.
Screams and words that kill,
Spit foaming, unseeing eyes;
This person I do not know
And soon he goes...but not forever.
Invisible scars run deep,
I've seen and felt their damage;
For her too you left no mark.
The tears, time lost, deep hurt and
Pain, these can always be explained away, but
They hurt as much as fire.
It is harder to face what you cannot see,
To heal yourself alone.
A child cries, for what she's seen and felt,
Both witness and little f*ck herself,
A worthless piece of shit with feelings
That have broken many times before.
To end this poem, I won't be harsh,
As no one is perfect in this world.
With time you've calmed,
Your heart has grown,
Yet still you sometimes lose control.
I know you try and care so much,
But it means nothing if you also strike the heart.
Words have the power to heal and love,
So please love yourself, love others, and trust.
Inside you have so much to give, so just let it go,
Whatever the 'it' is.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Be the Old Dog
An old dog pants, his eyes grow weary, his body aching. But dare a cat to brush his whiskers, he will react with strength renewed. It is never too late to live, to embrace joy and excitement, to fly.
The air fills with magic when love ignites; so too, with anger and fear it dances.
Two squirrels chase each others' tails, up the tree and down again, across the yard, fly through the grass, and STOP...then off again at last!
Whether in love or fear, it matters not: they are alive, and life flows inside and out, like a river forever moving on, like a wind that blows during a storm.
To freeze in place is a dark curse, as movement is what life needs to grow.
Inside your heart, inside your soul, the strength to move is waiting: find it!
Be the old dog who wakes to the chase, be that squirrel who runs with life's winds, be that horse who flies like time, though her feet never fully leave the ground.
Be that which to you matters most, but above all, be that who wakes to dance, sleeps to run, and lives to fly.
Be life, be joy, just be.
The air fills with magic when love ignites; so too, with anger and fear it dances.
Two squirrels chase each others' tails, up the tree and down again, across the yard, fly through the grass, and STOP...then off again at last!
Whether in love or fear, it matters not: they are alive, and life flows inside and out, like a river forever moving on, like a wind that blows during a storm.
To freeze in place is a dark curse, as movement is what life needs to grow.
Inside your heart, inside your soul, the strength to move is waiting: find it!
Be the old dog who wakes to the chase, be that squirrel who runs with life's winds, be that horse who flies like time, though her feet never fully leave the ground.
Be that which to you matters most, but above all, be that who wakes to dance, sleeps to run, and lives to fly.
Be life, be joy, just be.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Ask the Wolf #2
Dear Ms. Wolf,
"I've fallen and I can't get up. Please help me. And what can I do to keep from falling again?"
Good question. Actually, falling is only a bad thing if we choose to see it as such. If you never try to push the boundaries or yourself, you'll never fall. And even with accidental falls, you can still gain something if you put aside society's norms and think for yourself. If you only reach for the stars, sooner or later you'll forget what's down below and lose your own foundation. And no one wants to be a hot air balloon forever rising up, up, up until it loses steam or overheats in the dazzling sunlight.
Just as you can rise up to find new paths, so too can you fall down and gain new perspectives. Or new knowledge, to help prevent an even bigger fall in the future. And 'up' is not only in the direction of the clouds. Sometimes, it takes a fall and an unexpected grounding in order to truly rise up.
"I've fallen and I can't get up. Please help me. And what can I do to keep from falling again?"
Good question. Actually, falling is only a bad thing if we choose to see it as such. If you never try to push the boundaries or yourself, you'll never fall. And even with accidental falls, you can still gain something if you put aside society's norms and think for yourself. If you only reach for the stars, sooner or later you'll forget what's down below and lose your own foundation. And no one wants to be a hot air balloon forever rising up, up, up until it loses steam or overheats in the dazzling sunlight.
Just as you can rise up to find new paths, so too can you fall down and gain new perspectives. Or new knowledge, to help prevent an even bigger fall in the future. And 'up' is not only in the direction of the clouds. Sometimes, it takes a fall and an unexpected grounding in order to truly rise up.
Friday, May 7, 2010
Ask the Wolf #1
"What do you do when you have no one in the world to talk to? When even your family is unavailable for real talks: mom hysterical, dad angry, brother unwilling to listen, dog... Hmm, well, I guess the dog could actually listen, YES! But what do you do?"
You know what you do? You just smile and realize that this is your life and no one should be able to take it away from you. Life isn't supposed to hurt all the time, so if it's feeling like that, then something's wrong and you can and should fix it. And if family doesn't understand, then look within yourself for the strength to deal. Friends should support you and help you in kind, patient ways, not threaten you or respond with negative energy when you talk to them. And if your family is responding in this way, then do what you would do with friends like this: give them some breathing room and find other outlets. Even if it's just your dog or the great world of Nature. And for goodness sake, put on some good music and let your iPod (or boombox) take you to that happy place where all is good and life is a beautiful melody that begs you to sing with it. Now go find that place :)
You know what you do? You just smile and realize that this is your life and no one should be able to take it away from you. Life isn't supposed to hurt all the time, so if it's feeling like that, then something's wrong and you can and should fix it. And if family doesn't understand, then look within yourself for the strength to deal. Friends should support you and help you in kind, patient ways, not threaten you or respond with negative energy when you talk to them. And if your family is responding in this way, then do what you would do with friends like this: give them some breathing room and find other outlets. Even if it's just your dog or the great world of Nature. And for goodness sake, put on some good music and let your iPod (or boombox) take you to that happy place where all is good and life is a beautiful melody that begs you to sing with it. Now go find that place :)
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Grocery Stores, Life, and Robin Williams
Nothing like going to the grocery store with your mom, especially when the friendly check-out lady randomly decides to ask what school you go to. "Oh, not in school right now," you say. "So you've already graduated from high school? (awkward pause, while she mulls over this impossibility) Wow, you seem like a little girl." "Ummm.....yep, I have, and thank you [I guess]." High school, hmm, I think I can vaguely remember... Ay, well, there's two ways to look at this. One, be upset that you don't fit the norm (ever) and wish that you could be normal for once, act your age for once, or else go back in time to when you were 18. Or two, realize that you are indeed acting your age and being yourself, even if it seems weird to others. And if you come off a bit youthful, well, there's nothing wrong with that. There's more than one way to be a grown-up (as Robin Williams and Adam Sandler can attest to). And note to self: next time I'm here, will wear disguise.
Life can be tough and try to bring you down, but don't ever let it. Keep your wits about you and try to look on the bright side and laugh at the little things. 'So you don't look/act/feel/smell/eat normal' or 'your jeans got ripped, you tripped and fell on a pine cone, and you forgot your new friend's name again'. So what? Does anyone even know what normal really is? If anything, I'm tempted to say that normal is actually 'being abnormal'. So if you're being normal, you're not really normal. Confusing? Heck yeah! So why worry about it? 'So you feel lost and don't know what to do next?' Does anyone? If anything, being lost is a great chance to start over and create new paths. I know it sucks to feel that way, but you won't be lost forever (at least I hope not, as I need to find myself and get outta this town soon, preferably before I go crazy ;). I'm confident that we all have everything we need for our journey inside of us, we just have to learn to listen, to figure out where we need to go. Easy to say, but hard to do, yes. But not impossible, we just have to separate the distractions from the things that really make life seem wonderful and light us up inside. But be aware: sometimes the distractions may be masquerading as the real deal, so you have to listen to your heart. I'm still trying to do this, and it's not easy, but just takes time I suppose.
And here's something else I wanna share with you guys: Sometimes, not fitting in anywhere gives you the rare ability to fit in everywhere.
Just think about it... (and it's true, from my experience)
Life can be tough and try to bring you down, but don't ever let it. Keep your wits about you and try to look on the bright side and laugh at the little things. 'So you don't look/act/feel/smell/eat normal' or 'your jeans got ripped, you tripped and fell on a pine cone, and you forgot your new friend's name again'. So what? Does anyone even know what normal really is? If anything, I'm tempted to say that normal is actually 'being abnormal'. So if you're being normal, you're not really normal. Confusing? Heck yeah! So why worry about it? 'So you feel lost and don't know what to do next?' Does anyone? If anything, being lost is a great chance to start over and create new paths. I know it sucks to feel that way, but you won't be lost forever (at least I hope not, as I need to find myself and get outta this town soon, preferably before I go crazy ;). I'm confident that we all have everything we need for our journey inside of us, we just have to learn to listen, to figure out where we need to go. Easy to say, but hard to do, yes. But not impossible, we just have to separate the distractions from the things that really make life seem wonderful and light us up inside. But be aware: sometimes the distractions may be masquerading as the real deal, so you have to listen to your heart. I'm still trying to do this, and it's not easy, but just takes time I suppose.
And here's something else I wanna share with you guys: Sometimes, not fitting in anywhere gives you the rare ability to fit in everywhere.
Just think about it... (and it's true, from my experience)
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
"Little Wonders" (Rob Thomas song & video!)
I just wanted to share this with you guys, in case you need a great song or a good laugh or smile.
This is one of the all-time greatest songs, and if you've never heard Rob Thomas talking about what his songs are about, then you're missing out! Whether or not you're a fan of his, this is one of those songs that can always make you feel good :) And his live performances are wonderful. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRngvVuTT5s
(You've gotta copy & paste the link, but it's worth it, & sometimes old school is cool)
This is one of the all-time greatest songs, and if you've never heard Rob Thomas talking about what his songs are about, then you're missing out! Whether or not you're a fan of his, this is one of those songs that can always make you feel good :) And his live performances are wonderful. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRngvVuTT5s
(You've gotta copy & paste the link, but it's worth it, & sometimes old school is cool)
G-d and Time
I have heard that a kind word can mean so much; sometimes, it's true.
And they say that only time will tell, but how do I learn to hear her?
For lo, she speaks within me, through my actions and my thoughts, laid out upon a dusty line.
And through my changing countenance, changing body, growing mind.
But also she resides outside, changing people, buildings, Earth.
Through ever-changing space she flies, taking me with her; I cannot let go or change her course. Or can I?
And for all who say you must be strong, beautiful, charismatic to stand out in life,
I'd say that she is all these things, just not in the way you might think.
Perhaps she is G-d's prized creation, or even part of G-d Herself.
I cannot separate the two, though G-d is much more than just this dimension.
But each second that passes has a spark of holiness, a bit of magic, as it was and now is not...but yet still is.
Just as Hashem once said, "I will be what I am becoming".
So too, the essence of time: perhaps G-d's essence is like pixie dust within it.
If it doesn't stand the test of time, it will fall, crumble, dissolve; but who's to say that time has this power? Could it be our own lack of power instead?
The truth I believe only G-d knows, but we cannot know it all.
For if we did, we would be as G-d, and G-d is one, yet infinitely unknowable.
And they say that only time will tell, but how do I learn to hear her?
For lo, she speaks within me, through my actions and my thoughts, laid out upon a dusty line.
And through my changing countenance, changing body, growing mind.
But also she resides outside, changing people, buildings, Earth.
Through ever-changing space she flies, taking me with her; I cannot let go or change her course. Or can I?
And for all who say you must be strong, beautiful, charismatic to stand out in life,
I'd say that she is all these things, just not in the way you might think.
Perhaps she is G-d's prized creation, or even part of G-d Herself.
I cannot separate the two, though G-d is much more than just this dimension.
But each second that passes has a spark of holiness, a bit of magic, as it was and now is not...but yet still is.
Just as Hashem once said, "I will be what I am becoming".
So too, the essence of time: perhaps G-d's essence is like pixie dust within it.
If it doesn't stand the test of time, it will fall, crumble, dissolve; but who's to say that time has this power? Could it be our own lack of power instead?
The truth I believe only G-d knows, but we cannot know it all.
For if we did, we would be as G-d, and G-d is one, yet infinitely unknowable.
Monday, April 26, 2010
I love my car
I love my car.
Some would say, this cannot be,
For feelings are reserved for life alone.
Really?
Perhaps feelings have more to do
With actions and connections,
Whether or not the other breathes
Or enjoys a nice meal of gasoline:
Love is blind to trifles like these.
I love my car,
Not for its speed, but for its
Steadfast loyalty, for all the times
We spent in song, for the
Times I cried and it was there,
My head buried against his side,
Tears streaming down the well-worn cloth.
He never once thought to drive away,
For he could not move; but here, I was safe.
A good friend listens, hesitates to judge,
Because there is much she cannot know.
And every person is beautiful, hiding much
But striving to let it go.
My car knows this instinctively,
Or should I say, fails to overthink,
As many of us, blessed with human minds,
Often struggle with thought, act like fools,
Or leave.
I love my car, not as human love,
But as love for something innately real,
A friend who never thinks too much
But waits for me, no matter what life brings.
*Side note:* My car has twice saved my life from really serious car accidents that didn't happen because he listened to my hands and felt the road and a way out. We can all learn from him, even though he is not alive in the sense we normally think of. He reminds me of the Tin Man, though you guys are free to make your own comparisons!
Some would say, this cannot be,
For feelings are reserved for life alone.
Really?
Perhaps feelings have more to do
With actions and connections,
Whether or not the other breathes
Or enjoys a nice meal of gasoline:
Love is blind to trifles like these.
I love my car,
Not for its speed, but for its
Steadfast loyalty, for all the times
We spent in song, for the
Times I cried and it was there,
My head buried against his side,
Tears streaming down the well-worn cloth.
He never once thought to drive away,
For he could not move; but here, I was safe.
A good friend listens, hesitates to judge,
Because there is much she cannot know.
And every person is beautiful, hiding much
But striving to let it go.
My car knows this instinctively,
Or should I say, fails to overthink,
As many of us, blessed with human minds,
Often struggle with thought, act like fools,
Or leave.
I love my car, not as human love,
But as love for something innately real,
A friend who never thinks too much
But waits for me, no matter what life brings.
*Side note:* My car has twice saved my life from really serious car accidents that didn't happen because he listened to my hands and felt the road and a way out. We can all learn from him, even though he is not alive in the sense we normally think of. He reminds me of the Tin Man, though you guys are free to make your own comparisons!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
The Journey
The theme of American Idol this week was...INSPIRATIONAL SONGS! So, I suddenly felt inspired to write an inspirational poem. What a show, such a great influence, as are those brave musicians on it ;)
---
"The Journey"
If life was just one long smooth road
The journey would be easy.
We'd never have to shed a tear
Nor stumble over broken glass.
The night itself would never come,
Our life played out in one long day.
No sudden turns along the way,
No falls in holes,
No walls to climb.
A life like this might seem ideal
But like a book, each page the same.
And challenges, though not always fair,
Are driven by the winds of change.
Each turn and twist along the way
Gives life its sense of meaning.
And the obstacles we all must face
Unite us, and
Define our being.
---
"The Journey"
If life was just one long smooth road
The journey would be easy.
We'd never have to shed a tear
Nor stumble over broken glass.
The night itself would never come,
Our life played out in one long day.
No sudden turns along the way,
No falls in holes,
No walls to climb.
A life like this might seem ideal
But like a book, each page the same.
And challenges, though not always fair,
Are driven by the winds of change.
Each turn and twist along the way
Gives life its sense of meaning.
And the obstacles we all must face
Unite us, and
Define our being.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Technology, Dogs, Cashiers, and You!
So, technology is the wave of the future, no? Well, hopefully they didn't mean this too literally, as in wiping out all of humanity in one massive tidal wave of high tech products. Don't worry, it hasn't reached nearly this level yet, but I can just imagine the headlines: "Want a dog? How bout one who doesn't pee, poop, jump on furniture, or need to be walked twice a day. Just select size, gender, personality, and type, and Fido will be at your door by tomorrow morning. Batteries not included." Oho, but I'm only talking about dogs, you say, what about people? What do dogs have to do with me?
Well, let's swap out "dog" for "grocery store cashier". Want a cashier who doesn't pee, poop, jump on furniture (eh, ok, maybe some do, you never know), require a paycheck, or need a lunch break? Then our computerized cashier is for you, no batteries required, no money needed, one more human out of a job. Seriously, this is already happening. Remember those automatic checkout lines in the grocery store? Those annoying computerized voices that are either way too loud, in another language, or just too darn demanding? "Please place the item in the bag." "Please place the item in the bag." "Please see the cashier, you are being too difficult for my computerized brain." AAAAAHHH, darn computer, what if I just didn't want a stupid bag? What if I wanted to save the environment? Do you even care? Heck, do you even know what food is? Besides credit cards?
It drives me crazy that computers are taking people's jobs and taking away the chance for a normal, friendly conversation and interpersonal relations. Not that kind, sheesh, I just mean a normal HUMAN interaction. Just a few weeks ago, my favorite movie store announced it was soon closing its doors. Several people out of work and the rest of us out of luck. Know what's gonna show up next? A Blockbuster DVD Kiosk, or else a Red Box, all electronic, no humans required. Heck, if I had wanted to talk to a machine, I would have ordered Netflix. Nothing wrong with Netflix, but let the computers stay computers, not trying to function like portable people. Especially in an age when people really need their jobs. But at least some stores, like Publix, Whole Foods, and Trader Joe's are standing up for their employees. By keeping their store management and employees human...unless they've partaken of the newest wave of life-like robots. Uh oh, here we go again.
Well, let's swap out "dog" for "grocery store cashier". Want a cashier who doesn't pee, poop, jump on furniture (eh, ok, maybe some do, you never know), require a paycheck, or need a lunch break? Then our computerized cashier is for you, no batteries required, no money needed, one more human out of a job. Seriously, this is already happening. Remember those automatic checkout lines in the grocery store? Those annoying computerized voices that are either way too loud, in another language, or just too darn demanding? "Please place the item in the bag." "Please place the item in the bag." "Please see the cashier, you are being too difficult for my computerized brain." AAAAAHHH, darn computer, what if I just didn't want a stupid bag? What if I wanted to save the environment? Do you even care? Heck, do you even know what food is? Besides credit cards?
It drives me crazy that computers are taking people's jobs and taking away the chance for a normal, friendly conversation and interpersonal relations. Not that kind, sheesh, I just mean a normal HUMAN interaction. Just a few weeks ago, my favorite movie store announced it was soon closing its doors. Several people out of work and the rest of us out of luck. Know what's gonna show up next? A Blockbuster DVD Kiosk, or else a Red Box, all electronic, no humans required. Heck, if I had wanted to talk to a machine, I would have ordered Netflix. Nothing wrong with Netflix, but let the computers stay computers, not trying to function like portable people. Especially in an age when people really need their jobs. But at least some stores, like Publix, Whole Foods, and Trader Joe's are standing up for their employees. By keeping their store management and employees human...unless they've partaken of the newest wave of life-like robots. Uh oh, here we go again.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
A beam of light
A beam of light falls down a tree
And rests on branches, leaves now golden.
This beam has friends, a sheet of light
In which it lives and becomes one.
Or perhaps the beam is very large
And sits alone upon that tree
So life and light together
Keep each other friendly company.
Whichever may be true, who knows, but there is more to teach.
Don't overlook the light within and keep a friend in reach.
And rests on branches, leaves now golden.
This beam has friends, a sheet of light
In which it lives and becomes one.
Or perhaps the beam is very large
And sits alone upon that tree
So life and light together
Keep each other friendly company.
Whichever may be true, who knows, but there is more to teach.
Don't overlook the light within and keep a friend in reach.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
If Time Is Life
If time is life, is life merely time?
A day is just a day, no matter how you paint it
--But no two paintings are alike.
Does time have character?
Can it change and evolve?
And just because our existence is confined to a time-line, both
Personal and historical, does this mean we are
Mere dots in the ever-evolving trajectory of time?
We can follow a point (or sphere) on its path, and see a life unfold in time.
Yet time cannot contain it fully,
For a living spirit knows no bounds, no space or time,
Only its eternal G-dly essence.
The lesson here is clear: we must not focus on just mere theory.
Objective points move on a line, their disappearance in time ends their story.
But are they truly ever gone, for the line in which they arose is eternal...
And all these lines and points and time, these alone are not life's true spirit.
To understand what life really is, well, you must go and live it!
A day is just a day, no matter how you paint it
--But no two paintings are alike.
Does time have character?
Can it change and evolve?
And just because our existence is confined to a time-line, both
Personal and historical, does this mean we are
Mere dots in the ever-evolving trajectory of time?
We can follow a point (or sphere) on its path, and see a life unfold in time.
Yet time cannot contain it fully,
For a living spirit knows no bounds, no space or time,
Only its eternal G-dly essence.
The lesson here is clear: we must not focus on just mere theory.
Objective points move on a line, their disappearance in time ends their story.
But are they truly ever gone, for the line in which they arose is eternal...
And all these lines and points and time, these alone are not life's true spirit.
To understand what life really is, well, you must go and live it!
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Spring
A flower blooms a silent song of love,
And high above, a cardinal sings,
A squirrel flits,
A tree smiles.
But beyond it all, the sun looks on
And winks through clouds
Dancing on windows.
I feel the life around me
Moving, smiling, dancing, living.
If the world can light up with a smile,
then so can I -- look, I'm grinning!
And high above, a cardinal sings,
A squirrel flits,
A tree smiles.
But beyond it all, the sun looks on
And winks through clouds
Dancing on windows.
I feel the life around me
Moving, smiling, dancing, living.
If the world can light up with a smile,
then so can I -- look, I'm grinning!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
"Everything"
Everything has a beginning and an end.
Except that which created "Everything",
"Beginning", and "End."
Except that which created "Everything",
"Beginning", and "End."
"Through the Clouds"
Through the clouds,
The sun still shines,
The birds still sing,
The time still flows.
What tomorrow may bring,
We'll never know,
But behind a cloud
Is always sun.
The sun still shines,
The birds still sing,
The time still flows.
What tomorrow may bring,
We'll never know,
But behind a cloud
Is always sun.
Friday, March 19, 2010
The Power of an Ant
There's a really cool quote by Lao Tzu (Father of Taoism) that I'm gonna share with you guys: "An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox."
Just think about it.
What does it matter if you're the strongest, the biggest, the most beautiful, the most impressive on the outside? What's outside is important, yes, but what's inside counts far more...and using it actively is what matters most. An ant is among the smallest of creatures, very ordinary in appearance, often unnoticed by the 'oxen' amongst us. But it is this little soul that, precisely because of its small size, has the strength to carry up to 20 (or even 50) times its own body weight and build impressive structures of earth that we often can't help but notice :-)
So next time you feel down and believe others to be better than you, more talented, more powerful: DON'T! As long as you can keep moving and doing the best with what you have, you'll be doing far more and far better than most of the rather sedentary (in more senses than one), "powerful" people in our society today.
Ok, now go have a piece of dark chocolate, that's an order! Haha, I can order myself to do that, but you're free to do what you want. If you like my idea (and it is a good one!), then that's great and wonderful, but don't blindly follow leaders just because their word is more powerful than yours. It's not...
Just think about it.
What does it matter if you're the strongest, the biggest, the most beautiful, the most impressive on the outside? What's outside is important, yes, but what's inside counts far more...and using it actively is what matters most. An ant is among the smallest of creatures, very ordinary in appearance, often unnoticed by the 'oxen' amongst us. But it is this little soul that, precisely because of its small size, has the strength to carry up to 20 (or even 50) times its own body weight and build impressive structures of earth that we often can't help but notice :-)
So next time you feel down and believe others to be better than you, more talented, more powerful: DON'T! As long as you can keep moving and doing the best with what you have, you'll be doing far more and far better than most of the rather sedentary (in more senses than one), "powerful" people in our society today.
Ok, now go have a piece of dark chocolate, that's an order! Haha, I can order myself to do that, but you're free to do what you want. If you like my idea (and it is a good one!), then that's great and wonderful, but don't blindly follow leaders just because their word is more powerful than yours. It's not...
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
If your life is a song...
If your life is a song, then what will your chorus be? You cannot always determine the verses, or their order, but the refrain is yours alone. No matter what else happens, there will be themes and values that keep repeating themselves throughout your life, at your choosing. What will your song look like? How will it sound? Even if the verses grow dark and the words cold, always remember that the chorus will come again. And it is up to you whether your life is sung in major...or minor. Choose well! :-)
Monday, March 15, 2010
Love and Robins
I used to believe in true love:
Unconditional, pure, healing, a dance of twin souls...
Someone’s said that before, I know,
But not at this particular moment,
Not in this room, and not with these eyes and the soul that hides behind.
I want to believe in love, in the power of love to overcome all.
To know that no matter what I do, I will be loved regardless.
That didn’t happen.
Love suspended is not pure, passive love is not healing,
For love to mean anything it must be active.
But active does not mean overwhelming, simply
Acting with the other’s best interest in mind.
Cradling their heart as if it were a robin’s egg:
Strong until dropped.
Love means not dropping that egg, not abandoning that soul,
Not blaming the other for life’s stormy seas.
True love should be caring, pure, a game of equals for lovers,
An open heart for family and friends.
A safe zone ruled by kindness and affection, not anger and accusations lurking beneath the surface, blocking out the other. Authority shouldn’t matter; in love, all are equal.
I used to believe in true love;
I have yet to see it.
But still, somehow, I believe...
Unconditional, pure, healing, a dance of twin souls...
Someone’s said that before, I know,
But not at this particular moment,
Not in this room, and not with these eyes and the soul that hides behind.
I want to believe in love, in the power of love to overcome all.
To know that no matter what I do, I will be loved regardless.
That didn’t happen.
Love suspended is not pure, passive love is not healing,
For love to mean anything it must be active.
But active does not mean overwhelming, simply
Acting with the other’s best interest in mind.
Cradling their heart as if it were a robin’s egg:
Strong until dropped.
Love means not dropping that egg, not abandoning that soul,
Not blaming the other for life’s stormy seas.
True love should be caring, pure, a game of equals for lovers,
An open heart for family and friends.
A safe zone ruled by kindness and affection, not anger and accusations lurking beneath the surface, blocking out the other. Authority shouldn’t matter; in love, all are equal.
I used to believe in true love;
I have yet to see it.
But still, somehow, I believe...
Alone
In that moment
My heart froze
And my soul screamed.
A cry of terror,
A sad squeak,
Unheard...
Utterly alone,
Invisible to those who
Saw without seeing,
Heard without hearing,
Felt their own lives,
Nothing more.
Climbing out of the pit,
I reached for kindness,
A guiding hand, embrace,
Love with no bounds.
Even the air was silent.
I was alone.
And terrified.
My heart froze
And my soul screamed.
A cry of terror,
A sad squeak,
Unheard...
Utterly alone,
Invisible to those who
Saw without seeing,
Heard without hearing,
Felt their own lives,
Nothing more.
Climbing out of the pit,
I reached for kindness,
A guiding hand, embrace,
Love with no bounds.
Even the air was silent.
I was alone.
And terrified.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Do Trees Need Sleep?
I've always wondered: do trees need sleep?
Or love, affection, how can I ask?
That a tree feels I do not doubt
Yet feeling is not just in human ways.
A tree in pain I'm sure cries out...
But who will listen?
Perhaps a sparrow can understand
And sing a soothing lullaby
Or a yellow daisy open up and
Smile in thanks for shade and sun.
A squirrel deftly climbs upon her trunk
And nests there with the setting sun.
A tree is a world unto herself,
Yet also part of a larger truth,
And thus it seems that you and me are
Not so different from this tree.
Yet I don't know how to talk with her,
I don't know how to understand
But yet I'm sure she speaks aloud
In ways I haven't yet learned to hear.
And so each tree can teach us that
There is far more than just ourselves
Or those like us, in shape and size.
But our spirits are all from the same Great source,
And the Universe
Speaks in G-d's own tongue.
Or love, affection, how can I ask?
That a tree feels I do not doubt
Yet feeling is not just in human ways.
A tree in pain I'm sure cries out...
But who will listen?
Perhaps a sparrow can understand
And sing a soothing lullaby
Or a yellow daisy open up and
Smile in thanks for shade and sun.
A squirrel deftly climbs upon her trunk
And nests there with the setting sun.
A tree is a world unto herself,
Yet also part of a larger truth,
And thus it seems that you and me are
Not so different from this tree.
Yet I don't know how to talk with her,
I don't know how to understand
But yet I'm sure she speaks aloud
In ways I haven't yet learned to hear.
And so each tree can teach us that
There is far more than just ourselves
Or those like us, in shape and size.
But our spirits are all from the same Great source,
And the Universe
Speaks in G-d's own tongue.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
A Chipmunk's Tale
I wonder...
Hmm, bright sun,
Any cats?
Nothing in sight
So...
I'llgoreallyfastand
There'sanutoohanother
Ihavemoreroom
Here'sonemoreokSTOP!
No, notstopmoving,
Stopnuts, rungo!
Go,go,fast,home,HOME!
Ahh, safe, food, home,
Snack?
Nah, well, hmm, maybe, what,
Snahhhh kshoooo, khaahhhh kshuuuwuwu,
Khaahhh wijuuuuwuwu...
...Khaahhhh OY! Morning?
Hmm, I wonder...
Hmm, bright sun,
Any cats?
Nothing in sight
So...
I'llgoreallyfastand
There'sanutoohanother
Ihavemoreroom
Here'sonemoreokSTOP!
No, notstopmoving,
Stopnuts, rungo!
Go,go,fast,home,HOME!
Ahh, safe, food, home,
Snack?
Nah, well, hmm, maybe, what,
Snahhhh kshoooo, khaahhhh kshuuuwuwu,
Khaahhh wijuuuuwuwu...
...Khaahhhh OY! Morning?
Hmm, I wonder...
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Lessons From the Heart
Sometimes there are just things to be said, and even if the right people don't hear them, at least you put them out there. Know what I mean? And sometimes, in dealing with your own situation, you come across universal truths, and these things should be shared, must be shared, because they could help others. Right? :)
So here's something I'm sure I've heard before, but it never really sunk in until I experienced it myself. Ready for it? Here goes: You cannot truly care about someone without also giving them the power to hurt you.
I know, it sounds a bit out there, but just think about it. If you really open up your heart to allow yourself to care about someone else, then you are, by definition, making yourself vulnerable. Because to care openly and honestly, you must first lower your defenses. And with defenses down, the risk of being hurt is a given. So why lower them at all, what's the point, isn't it better to protect yourself at all costs? Maybe, but to do so would mean closing off your heart, refusing to care (really care) about anyone, never knowing what true friendship or relationships might mean.
Life is always a trade off, a game of balance. But some trade offs are worth it, and I believe that caring is one of them. Even if it means getting hurt, at least you know that there is more in the world than just you. And that your heart is capable of love, which itself is something to be proud of.
So here's something I'm sure I've heard before, but it never really sunk in until I experienced it myself. Ready for it? Here goes: You cannot truly care about someone without also giving them the power to hurt you.
I know, it sounds a bit out there, but just think about it. If you really open up your heart to allow yourself to care about someone else, then you are, by definition, making yourself vulnerable. Because to care openly and honestly, you must first lower your defenses. And with defenses down, the risk of being hurt is a given. So why lower them at all, what's the point, isn't it better to protect yourself at all costs? Maybe, but to do so would mean closing off your heart, refusing to care (really care) about anyone, never knowing what true friendship or relationships might mean.
Life is always a trade off, a game of balance. But some trade offs are worth it, and I believe that caring is one of them. Even if it means getting hurt, at least you know that there is more in the world than just you. And that your heart is capable of love, which itself is something to be proud of.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Rain falls, not rises
Rain falls, not rises,
Reminding us always that
There is more above than we know.
Earth shakes and trembles,
Great buildings and people
Reduced to mere pawns in Nature's eyes.
The Universe speaks daily, in
Whispers and yawns, in
Smiles and shouts.
But more often than not,
G-d's signs are no more than
A fleeting glimpse of magic,
Subtle, small miracles hiding
In an ordinary world.
Reminding us always that
There is more above than we know.
Earth shakes and trembles,
Great buildings and people
Reduced to mere pawns in Nature's eyes.
The Universe speaks daily, in
Whispers and yawns, in
Smiles and shouts.
But more often than not,
G-d's signs are no more than
A fleeting glimpse of magic,
Subtle, small miracles hiding
In an ordinary world.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
A Black Pen
A black pen writes,
But does it live?
It laughs and cries,
With words it flies
But does it feel?
It is a mouth with no soul,
A hand with no body,
A portal to the mind,
But left behind,
It has no life.
One little pen,
Black grip,
Clear plastic,
Motionless and uninspired
It cries a lonely sob,
Without a job, it has
No purpose.
A sad drumstick it would make,
Or break apart, chewed
By a dog.
"Why this ink inside have I
If no one comes to help me fly?"
But one day soon,
A hand will come, will hold the
Pen, as should be done,
And gently, oh so gently
They will write
A sacred lullaby.
A pen alone is not a pen.
It is mere plastic,
Stagnant ink.
A pen in hand, however,
Gains a life, a voice, a heart,
A friend.
But does it live?
It laughs and cries,
With words it flies
But does it feel?
It is a mouth with no soul,
A hand with no body,
A portal to the mind,
But left behind,
It has no life.
One little pen,
Black grip,
Clear plastic,
Motionless and uninspired
It cries a lonely sob,
Without a job, it has
No purpose.
A sad drumstick it would make,
Or break apart, chewed
By a dog.
"Why this ink inside have I
If no one comes to help me fly?"
But one day soon,
A hand will come, will hold the
Pen, as should be done,
And gently, oh so gently
They will write
A sacred lullaby.
A pen alone is not a pen.
It is mere plastic,
Stagnant ink.
A pen in hand, however,
Gains a life, a voice, a heart,
A friend.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Thoughts on Kol Isha (often interpreted as a prohibition against women singing in the presence of men)
No one has the right to take away a woman's voice. Aside from during the Shema, if a man cannot maintain control over his thoughts upon hearing a woman singing, that is his problem and he should work on it. If he is so weak minded, how could he thus control his thoughts if his kids upset him, if a stranger insults him or feeds his ego? Silencing others for his own lack of willpower is not Kiddush Hashem.
And this idea can also relate to all religions or ways of life. Silencing another (or blaming another) for your own shortcomings and lack of control is never good. It is far better to work to control your own mind, rather than complain that others "make you" have bad or improper thoughts. The thoughts are your own...control them wisely as best you can. =)
And this idea can also relate to all religions or ways of life. Silencing another (or blaming another) for your own shortcomings and lack of control is never good. It is far better to work to control your own mind, rather than complain that others "make you" have bad or improper thoughts. The thoughts are your own...control them wisely as best you can. =)
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Some say that G-d
Some say that G-d does not
Test us unless we have the strength
To handle it.
Perhaps, but in the sense that obstacles
Force us to be stronger,
To find or create new strength.
Some say we cannot know the reason for
Life’s pain and heart-wrenching sorrow.
This I believe, but still I cry out:
Wrongs are wrongs, no matter the reason, no matter
Their creator, or lack of one.
My whole spirit hurts.
And no one has died.
Except a part of my soul,
Which struggles to breathe.
Nowhere to turn,
The future unclear.
Innocence should not be
Mistaken
For what it is not.
Kindness need not have
Ulterior motives.
Pure love has no bounds,
No limits,
No conditions
But that it be respected,
Not trampled
Or shunned.
And of family, G-d, I ask you:
Where were You when I cried out
For You to heal the past,
Protect my soul,
Heal my family,
Heal those in pain,
Show Yourself?
Did you listen?
There was only silence.
I know the world is in my hands,
And in those of mortal spirits.
Your absence I still don’t understand,
Though perhaps, as a great man once said,
G-d doesn’t always shout, sometimes He whispers...
Test us unless we have the strength
To handle it.
Perhaps, but in the sense that obstacles
Force us to be stronger,
To find or create new strength.
Some say we cannot know the reason for
Life’s pain and heart-wrenching sorrow.
This I believe, but still I cry out:
Wrongs are wrongs, no matter the reason, no matter
Their creator, or lack of one.
My whole spirit hurts.
And no one has died.
Except a part of my soul,
Which struggles to breathe.
Nowhere to turn,
The future unclear.
Innocence should not be
Mistaken
For what it is not.
Kindness need not have
Ulterior motives.
Pure love has no bounds,
No limits,
No conditions
But that it be respected,
Not trampled
Or shunned.
And of family, G-d, I ask you:
Where were You when I cried out
For You to heal the past,
Protect my soul,
Heal my family,
Heal those in pain,
Show Yourself?
Did you listen?
There was only silence.
I know the world is in my hands,
And in those of mortal spirits.
Your absence I still don’t understand,
Though perhaps, as a great man once said,
G-d doesn’t always shout, sometimes He whispers...
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Random Text Messages from Jesus and Such
So, yesterday I received a text message from Jesus (excuse me, 'about' Jesus), asking me if I knew that he died on the cross for me. And now that I know, telling me that I should share it with some friends and take responsibility for all that He did for me. Ok, weird... And today, some random cell phone spam, but not just any spam, a personalized voice mail, informing me that I'm approved for some credit program or such. Now there are many things I would like to say in response, but I'll just keep it to one little bitty question: HOW IN THE HECK DID THESE PEOPLE GET MY CELL PHONE NUMBER???? Oh, I forgot...Jesus knows everything, and I'm sure he'd take credit :P
**disclaimer: no offense intended**
**second disclaimer: I had no prior knowledge that Jesus had a cell phone and a cell phone brigade**
**third disclaimer: I wonder what Jesus's number would be: hmm, maybe 1-800-JCR-OCKS**
**fourth disclaimer: seriously, no offense, just be cool...like Jesus on his cell, ha, sorry :) **
**disclaimer: no offense intended**
**second disclaimer: I had no prior knowledge that Jesus had a cell phone and a cell phone brigade**
**third disclaimer: I wonder what Jesus's number would be: hmm, maybe 1-800-JCR-OCKS**
**fourth disclaimer: seriously, no offense, just be cool...like Jesus on his cell, ha, sorry :) **
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Nothing But the Truth
If I could give one piece of advice to the world, I would have to borrow the words of Rabbi Akiva: "Veahavta lireacha kamocha". Basically, "love your neighbor as yourself". This sounds simple enough, but is it? In practice, I've found that some of the kindest people don't follow this when it matters. If you shut a very close friend completely out of your life, if you ignore them when they have no one else to turn to, if you refuse to consider their own situation and put yourself in their shoes and show mercy, then you are not living up to these words. No matter how wonderful you may think you are (or how wonderful I may think you are), this means nothing if you don't open your heart to others when it matters. Good friendship is not something you just throw away, and people's feelings and worth should matter more than a hurt ego. Yes, friends can screw up and we all know it, but they can also turn their lives around and come back stronger. So all I can say is when it comes down to it, the people who really care about us will still be standing with us when everything falls down. Even if we push them away, they'll come back. And if we don't have any friends like this, perhaps we should reconsider who our real friends are.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
You Can Change the World
One person can change the world for the better. Actually, one person does change the world in this way, quite regularly, in fact :) I believe when people think of change, they usually think of big changes, massive sweeping change that shoots through the heart of society and leaves it reeling from the sudden impact. The truth is, change like this does occur, but not as Hollywood-esque fairy tales would have you believe. Change, real change, takes time and is not the product of one brave or revolutionary action alone, but of many small actions that build up enough power to bring about a major change. After all, the African American Civil Rights movement, for example, was not something that happened in a day, but rather drew its power from the fact that it evolved and strengthened over more than a decade.
But I'm not just talking about major societal change here. What's just as important is the change that we bring about in our own lives and in those of people we know, even just those we come across in our daily reality. Ok, say you're walking down the street and you see someone who looks like they could use a hug. You smile at them and say hi (like you mean it) and try to be as cheerful as possible. [note: if you don't know them, it might be best not to actually *hug* them, even if they request a hug, as I did this once and it didn't exactly work out as planned. So please use discretion and learn from my mistakes :] But I digress. The thing is, one nice gesture, even just one kind word could put that person in a better mood. And people in better moods are happier people, kinder people, more likely to do good for others. And once you start a chain reaction of good, this is how you can bring about major change. You never know whose day you might turn around, just by being nice, and as good tends to beget more good, that one day will end with a lot more happiness in the world. So don't tell me that one person can't change the world. You can and you will, every time you choose to put a little more good into it. Starting now :)
But I'm not just talking about major societal change here. What's just as important is the change that we bring about in our own lives and in those of people we know, even just those we come across in our daily reality. Ok, say you're walking down the street and you see someone who looks like they could use a hug. You smile at them and say hi (like you mean it) and try to be as cheerful as possible. [note: if you don't know them, it might be best not to actually *hug* them, even if they request a hug, as I did this once and it didn't exactly work out as planned. So please use discretion and learn from my mistakes :] But I digress. The thing is, one nice gesture, even just one kind word could put that person in a better mood. And people in better moods are happier people, kinder people, more likely to do good for others. And once you start a chain reaction of good, this is how you can bring about major change. You never know whose day you might turn around, just by being nice, and as good tends to beget more good, that one day will end with a lot more happiness in the world. So don't tell me that one person can't change the world. You can and you will, every time you choose to put a little more good into it. Starting now :)
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
A Dolphin's Tale
I fly
Above
The gentle waters,
Free...
My heart,
Filled with today,
Worries not about
New suns.
If storms should come and
Sail away, still
Life remains,
A living sea.
Churning waters,
Darkened sky,
But underneath,
Beneath the surface,
Trouble stops.
And deep deep down,
Inside the ocean,
Beyond the mind,
Lie hope and love,
An endless sea.
This
Is my home.
This
Is my freedom.
This
Is my truth.
Welcome...
Above
The gentle waters,
Free...
My heart,
Filled with today,
Worries not about
New suns.
If storms should come and
Sail away, still
Life remains,
A living sea.
Churning waters,
Darkened sky,
But underneath,
Beneath the surface,
Trouble stops.
And deep deep down,
Inside the ocean,
Beyond the mind,
Lie hope and love,
An endless sea.
This
Is my home.
This
Is my freedom.
This
Is my truth.
Welcome...
Thursday, February 4, 2010
A little ant
A little ant
Knows not of love,
Knows not of pain,
Knows not of hate,
He knows only that life goes on
That sun feels good,
That food is life.
Not only that, but constant motion,
A kind of pure "to life" devotion,
Is the best use of his time.
To bring a scrap back to his queen,
To carry a torn friend back home,
To scour paths yet unexplored
And show the way to those who come,
To be forever on the run,
This is what is meant by having fun.
An ant knows not of laziness,
He knows no bounds of strength or fear,
He cannot see as far ahead as where
Fear lies, shamefulness, or dread.
To live means to be a working man,
To see the world, to feel the land,
To never stop believing that
It is the moment that makes the man.
Knows not of love,
Knows not of pain,
Knows not of hate,
He knows only that life goes on
That sun feels good,
That food is life.
Not only that, but constant motion,
A kind of pure "to life" devotion,
Is the best use of his time.
To bring a scrap back to his queen,
To carry a torn friend back home,
To scour paths yet unexplored
And show the way to those who come,
To be forever on the run,
This is what is meant by having fun.
An ant knows not of laziness,
He knows no bounds of strength or fear,
He cannot see as far ahead as where
Fear lies, shamefulness, or dread.
To live means to be a working man,
To see the world, to feel the land,
To never stop believing that
It is the moment that makes the man.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Positive Interpretations and Happy Realities
I read somewhere that 90% of your reality is based on your interpretation of it. So at any time, if you change how you look at a situation, you can thus change your own reality!
And if you change your interpretations of certain actions or motives, choosing to view them in a more positive light, you can change your views of people as well and expand your own perspectives. We are only aware of what we perceive, and often what we perceive is what we want to perceive. If we open our minds and hearts and look at things in a positive way, we might perceive far more...and far better realities. Erev tov!
And if you change your interpretations of certain actions or motives, choosing to view them in a more positive light, you can change your views of people as well and expand your own perspectives. We are only aware of what we perceive, and often what we perceive is what we want to perceive. If we open our minds and hearts and look at things in a positive way, we might perceive far more...and far better realities. Erev tov!
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Gifts of time
Sometimes the greatest gift you can give is time. And you can give it in so many different ways, just think about it... Anyway, that's all for today, sleep well my friends. And make sure you give yourself enough time to sleep... :P
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Ansley Mall & Morningside Atlanta Adventures
Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance" is a great song! Ha, sorry, it just came on the radio and I got distracted ;)
But now to Ansley Mall and my night-time Atlanta adventures. So, I just went to the Ansley Mall Kroger to get hot cocoa, cocoa powder, and chocolate rice cakes. Yes, I was in the mood for chocolate, but luckily this craving gave me the chance to have some awesome midtown Atlanta experiences. As I got out of my car and started walking towards Kroger, the entire Atlanta skyline was suddenly right in front of me, beautifully lit up and looking rather impressive...and not so far away. In fact, on a trip to Target yesterday, I missed one of my turns and almost ended up smack in the middle of downtown Atlanta. But you live and learn, that's the fun part! Anyway, once inside of Kroger, I saw several very cute gay couples walking down the aisles. In fact, all I saw were gay couples or gay singles :P It can be a good experience to be the odd one out sometimes, I think we all need that in order to be able to understand how others feel -- when we actually have the chance to put ourselves in their shoes. And I knew Morningside/Lenox Park was a nice area, but I had no idea it was the center of Gay Atlanta! Oh, and my search for rice cakes led me all over Kroger, until several kind cashiers informed me that the rice cakes were currently residing in the "Nutrition" section. It seems that they don't enjoy staying too long in any one place, so they need to change their location at least once a week, just to stay happy and change things up. This in complete seriousness. And how would the staff ever have the strength to deal with the sheer boredom of a week without the beloved search for the renegade rice cakes? Though personally, I think those rice cakes are just trying to avoid being eaten... :)
But now to Ansley Mall and my night-time Atlanta adventures. So, I just went to the Ansley Mall Kroger to get hot cocoa, cocoa powder, and chocolate rice cakes. Yes, I was in the mood for chocolate, but luckily this craving gave me the chance to have some awesome midtown Atlanta experiences. As I got out of my car and started walking towards Kroger, the entire Atlanta skyline was suddenly right in front of me, beautifully lit up and looking rather impressive...and not so far away. In fact, on a trip to Target yesterday, I missed one of my turns and almost ended up smack in the middle of downtown Atlanta. But you live and learn, that's the fun part! Anyway, once inside of Kroger, I saw several very cute gay couples walking down the aisles. In fact, all I saw were gay couples or gay singles :P It can be a good experience to be the odd one out sometimes, I think we all need that in order to be able to understand how others feel -- when we actually have the chance to put ourselves in their shoes. And I knew Morningside/Lenox Park was a nice area, but I had no idea it was the center of Gay Atlanta! Oh, and my search for rice cakes led me all over Kroger, until several kind cashiers informed me that the rice cakes were currently residing in the "Nutrition" section. It seems that they don't enjoy staying too long in any one place, so they need to change their location at least once a week, just to stay happy and change things up. This in complete seriousness. And how would the staff ever have the strength to deal with the sheer boredom of a week without the beloved search for the renegade rice cakes? Though personally, I think those rice cakes are just trying to avoid being eaten... :)
Friday, January 22, 2010
Tears and snot...magical good things???
I say YES!!! Imagine if you felt sad and upset and you had no way to express it and no one to express it to. Imagine if you slammed your finger in a car door and all you could do was think to yourself: OOUUCHHH! Tears are there for a reason, they give you an outlet and the power to comfort yourself. And snot, well, one of the many divine gifts to humanity ;) Next time you're upset and get to the point where you have to blow your nose, just think how satisfying that feels. It's like you're getting the chance to expel all that bad energy, all that bad emotion, and actually see it going out of you. And you feel freer as a result, you've actually accomplished something, you showed that snot who's boss. And I know this seems kind of silly and I do like joking around, but the next time this happens to you, think about it... Shooting streams of water out of your eyes and propelling sticky snot webs out of your nose, these things are magical in a way. I mean, they do sound a lot like super powers... :)
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
The "Love Yourself & Be Confident" Pep Talk
"What others think of you is not as important as what you think of yourself" -- You've gotta love yourself before you can ever love anyone else, you have to realize that you're the only one who can change your life, and it's never too late to start. And if others are bringing you down, find those who make you feel good and accept you as you are. And never ever give up, you have so much more strength inside than you realize, and you are far more beautiful than you know, if you listen to your heart and believe in yourself. Let others think what they will, it's your life and your opinions about yourself that matter.
Haha, this sounds like a personal pep talk for myself, but I'm really just trying to give some good advice. And ok, a little confidence boost never hurt anyone ;)
Haha, this sounds like a personal pep talk for myself, but I'm really just trying to give some good advice. And ok, a little confidence boost never hurt anyone ;)
Recent Decisions
I change my mind
You raise your fist
Why does it always have to be like this?
Indecisive is my middle name
But this time, I've decided well.
Life is not a game you lose,
Most things are not such a big deal
As you make them seem
When I try to talk
And you don't even hear
Because your mind is blank
With rage again
You lose control and
Slam the door
Break the knob
And shove my mom
Who's on your side
And call me things
I'd never say
And threaten me
Inside my room
If you were anyone else...I'd hit you.
But you're my dad,
Most often kind
But with this rage locked up inside
Why do you not seek outside help
If this you can't control yourself?
I'm tired of being the one who's blamed
For everything gone wrong again
I know I've made mistakes
Hurt friends
I've been so fragile, so very thin,
I know I'm just one little ant
Inside a world as big as France.
And I know that I still need to find
A way to live, a way to fly
That does not bring me pain and tears
I'm sick of that, it's been long years
I'm ready to shed my old skin
Be bold and brave, be kind and weird,
For the past is gone, I won't look back
I need to find a better path
To happiness, which we all should have.
I wish so much the whole world would laugh
And feel for others, always have their backs,
And bond together in love and joy,
And embrace old friends, welcome them back.
This day I hope will one day come,
But alas, I cannot be the one
To show you how to heal your head,
To heal your heart, you must try instead
To face your pain, be strong and brave,
Just don't blame me for the hurt you save.
Over my own life I have control,
But another's life is his own to hold.
You raise your fist
Why does it always have to be like this?
Indecisive is my middle name
But this time, I've decided well.
Life is not a game you lose,
Most things are not such a big deal
As you make them seem
When I try to talk
And you don't even hear
Because your mind is blank
With rage again
You lose control and
Slam the door
Break the knob
And shove my mom
Who's on your side
And call me things
I'd never say
And threaten me
Inside my room
If you were anyone else...I'd hit you.
But you're my dad,
Most often kind
But with this rage locked up inside
Why do you not seek outside help
If this you can't control yourself?
I'm tired of being the one who's blamed
For everything gone wrong again
I know I've made mistakes
Hurt friends
I've been so fragile, so very thin,
I know I'm just one little ant
Inside a world as big as France.
And I know that I still need to find
A way to live, a way to fly
That does not bring me pain and tears
I'm sick of that, it's been long years
I'm ready to shed my old skin
Be bold and brave, be kind and weird,
For the past is gone, I won't look back
I need to find a better path
To happiness, which we all should have.
I wish so much the whole world would laugh
And feel for others, always have their backs,
And bond together in love and joy,
And embrace old friends, welcome them back.
This day I hope will one day come,
But alas, I cannot be the one
To show you how to heal your head,
To heal your heart, you must try instead
To face your pain, be strong and brave,
Just don't blame me for the hurt you save.
Over my own life I have control,
But another's life is his own to hold.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Chocolate
Brown or black,
kiss or hug,
you never disappoint.
Your dark goodness embraces
my very soul, filling it
with joy.
Real,
wonderful,
loyal,
you never let me down.
From a mere cacao bean
you arise, bursting with happiness.
You are...delicious!
kiss or hug,
you never disappoint.
Your dark goodness embraces
my very soul, filling it
with joy.
Real,
wonderful,
loyal,
you never let me down.
From a mere cacao bean
you arise, bursting with happiness.
You are...delicious!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Second chances
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfrvyYyBDKc
This Lifehouse song ("Whatever It Takes") has such a great message, so I have to share it! Everyone deserves a second chance, a chance to change, especially if they care enough to actually try hard enough to make things better. Sometimes, we may give people a chance and they don't change, but this could be for one of two reasons:
1) They didn't really care enough to do anything different and didn't try to truly change themselves or how they relate to us -- and when we look into our gut, we feel that they probably will never change (at least with respect to us, in the way we need them to). In these circumstances, it is understandable to protect our hearts from these people and somewhat shut them out.
2) They did in fact try to change, but were unable to do so for reasons outside of their control -- understanding the choice in theory, but not really having the ability to fully choose in practice. These people can still hurt us and continue old patterns, but when we look into our gut, we feel that they do really care and can indeed change if circumstances improve. And if they can show us proof of actively fighting to change both themselves and their circumstances for the better, then we should give them another chance. When they truly do have the ability to choose how they relate to us and honor our friendship properly, then we will all benefit from the wonderful gift of second (or third) chances.
This Lifehouse song ("Whatever It Takes") has such a great message, so I have to share it! Everyone deserves a second chance, a chance to change, especially if they care enough to actually try hard enough to make things better. Sometimes, we may give people a chance and they don't change, but this could be for one of two reasons:
1) They didn't really care enough to do anything different and didn't try to truly change themselves or how they relate to us -- and when we look into our gut, we feel that they probably will never change (at least with respect to us, in the way we need them to). In these circumstances, it is understandable to protect our hearts from these people and somewhat shut them out.
2) They did in fact try to change, but were unable to do so for reasons outside of their control -- understanding the choice in theory, but not really having the ability to fully choose in practice. These people can still hurt us and continue old patterns, but when we look into our gut, we feel that they do really care and can indeed change if circumstances improve. And if they can show us proof of actively fighting to change both themselves and their circumstances for the better, then we should give them another chance. When they truly do have the ability to choose how they relate to us and honor our friendship properly, then we will all benefit from the wonderful gift of second (or third) chances.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Without light, there is no life
Without light, there is no life.
To walk in darkness is possible, yet temporary at best; for to keep moving forward, there must be light.
Whether dazzlingly bright or a dim glow, external or internal, new or everlasting, we are all children of the light, craving it as a thirsty child craves water.
Friends, love, kindness, these things illuminate and enrich our lives,
helping us to navigate darkened paths at twilight, awaiting the dawn that sometimes seems never to arrive.
But how can I see, how can I grow if the light goes out, and there is no flashlight, no full moon, no simple match?
If the brightest flame of friendship is no more, if a hardened heart is hurting and unable to care as before, no longer remembering the light he once gave?
Here the path is tricky, winding still, I must not fall or look back -- for the past itself is hazy, darkened by time and memory.
Only forward I must go, finding my own light in the slivers of gold bouncing off the mountain face, beams of the bashful sun who slowly peeks his head around the clouds.
A light so strong cannot be lost, only displaced, diverted, momentarily hidden, in need of another friendly light to show it the way, and let it shine once more.
Darkness cannot last forever, for light is far stronger and begets beauty, love, compassion, and hope.
In darkness there is nothing; in light, there is everything, and it is this light that I must now share with others.
Especially with you, for I must be that candle who can light any flame, give back to you who once lit my way.
For in light is healing, friendship, compassion, and a reminder that no matter how dark it gets, there is always a brighter path ahead -- and those who will light it for us.
Yes, it may be filled with rocks and inflame deep wounds inside our hearts, but the path to healing is never easy.
The way of light is not the easy way, yet it is the way we must travel to paint a future bright with hope, even if somewhat muted by pain.
To walk in darkness is possible, yet temporary at best; for to keep moving forward, there must be light.
Whether dazzlingly bright or a dim glow, external or internal, new or everlasting, we are all children of the light, craving it as a thirsty child craves water.
Friends, love, kindness, these things illuminate and enrich our lives,
helping us to navigate darkened paths at twilight, awaiting the dawn that sometimes seems never to arrive.
But how can I see, how can I grow if the light goes out, and there is no flashlight, no full moon, no simple match?
If the brightest flame of friendship is no more, if a hardened heart is hurting and unable to care as before, no longer remembering the light he once gave?
Here the path is tricky, winding still, I must not fall or look back -- for the past itself is hazy, darkened by time and memory.
Only forward I must go, finding my own light in the slivers of gold bouncing off the mountain face, beams of the bashful sun who slowly peeks his head around the clouds.
A light so strong cannot be lost, only displaced, diverted, momentarily hidden, in need of another friendly light to show it the way, and let it shine once more.
Darkness cannot last forever, for light is far stronger and begets beauty, love, compassion, and hope.
In darkness there is nothing; in light, there is everything, and it is this light that I must now share with others.
Especially with you, for I must be that candle who can light any flame, give back to you who once lit my way.
For in light is healing, friendship, compassion, and a reminder that no matter how dark it gets, there is always a brighter path ahead -- and those who will light it for us.
Yes, it may be filled with rocks and inflame deep wounds inside our hearts, but the path to healing is never easy.
The way of light is not the easy way, yet it is the way we must travel to paint a future bright with hope, even if somewhat muted by pain.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Lessons a bird taught me
A bird is sitting on a tree, whistling as the seconds pass.
I look again, and he is gone -- but there I see him, atop that bush.
Wings fluttering, soul chirping, he trills a love song and flies away.
Many lessons can I learn from such a bird:
One: never stay still for too long, for stagnation breeds unhappiness.
Two: let your soul sing every day, for for that purpose you were given a voice.
Three: When you sing, make it beautiful, for the greatest joy you can have is to put more joy in the world.
And four: if you feel lonely, then get off your tree and find another one. Do not let momentary unhappiness bring you down and keep you from living your life, finding your song, and spending time with those who matter.
I look again, and he is gone -- but there I see him, atop that bush.
Wings fluttering, soul chirping, he trills a love song and flies away.
Many lessons can I learn from such a bird:
One: never stay still for too long, for stagnation breeds unhappiness.
Two: let your soul sing every day, for for that purpose you were given a voice.
Three: When you sing, make it beautiful, for the greatest joy you can have is to put more joy in the world.
And four: if you feel lonely, then get off your tree and find another one. Do not let momentary unhappiness bring you down and keep you from living your life, finding your song, and spending time with those who matter.
Forgotten
Life is too short to be alone.
Silence shifts in shadows slipping slowly over saddened eyes.
Sagging spirits slumber senselessly --but freedom does not come with sleep.
How can no one care, no one talk, no one remember...
A mind left alone will go crazy, a heart will sag, a soul will cry:
Why am I forgotten?
Silence shifts in shadows slipping slowly over saddened eyes.
Sagging spirits slumber senselessly --but freedom does not come with sleep.
How can no one care, no one talk, no one remember...
A mind left alone will go crazy, a heart will sag, a soul will cry:
Why am I forgotten?
Traversing the river of pain
**It is not years but experiences and actions that determine our worth, our capacity for caring, for understanding, for knowing.**
I am not old, yet far too wise.
I am not wise, yet much too experienced.
I am not broken, but I know pain.
I know the depths of the dark sea, the feelings of fire, poison, ice --
inside, not out.
All pain, by nature, is internal.
A stick, alone, does not feel: it lacks the wholeness of a tree.
To feel, we need a life force, a growing consciousness, a soul.
I cannot know what you are feeling, but I can understand the pain, the isolation, the protective shield around the heart -- for to feel too deeply is to be immersed in a living ocean too vast for words... or breath.
I cannot help you as I wish, for I know not how to dry this ocean, fight the fire, reverse the past, heal the present and those in it.
I cannot affect the balance of the world, heal your heart and change G-d's wrongs-- for yes, I will call them that, I will shout them to the Heavens!
But I can listen, understand, feel more than most creatures of my years.
Once your heart has been torn, your soul scraped, there is no going back.
Healing will come, but scars will remain, and your heart will never be the same.
Stronger in some ways, yet weaker in others, for that seems to be the way of the world.
I am not wise, and I have no way of knowing your experience.
But my heart is open, my mind deepened by joy and pain.
So I promise you this: if it ever seems too much, you will never have to face it alone.
No matter how angry you are with me or how imperfect I am.
I will not let you fall, and that is the most I have to offer.
I am not old, yet far too wise.
I am not wise, yet much too experienced.
I am not broken, but I know pain.
I know the depths of the dark sea, the feelings of fire, poison, ice --
inside, not out.
All pain, by nature, is internal.
A stick, alone, does not feel: it lacks the wholeness of a tree.
To feel, we need a life force, a growing consciousness, a soul.
I cannot know what you are feeling, but I can understand the pain, the isolation, the protective shield around the heart -- for to feel too deeply is to be immersed in a living ocean too vast for words... or breath.
I cannot help you as I wish, for I know not how to dry this ocean, fight the fire, reverse the past, heal the present and those in it.
I cannot affect the balance of the world, heal your heart and change G-d's wrongs-- for yes, I will call them that, I will shout them to the Heavens!
But I can listen, understand, feel more than most creatures of my years.
Once your heart has been torn, your soul scraped, there is no going back.
Healing will come, but scars will remain, and your heart will never be the same.
Stronger in some ways, yet weaker in others, for that seems to be the way of the world.
I am not wise, and I have no way of knowing your experience.
But my heart is open, my mind deepened by joy and pain.
So I promise you this: if it ever seems too much, you will never have to face it alone.
No matter how angry you are with me or how imperfect I am.
I will not let you fall, and that is the most I have to offer.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Losing friends
At first glance they say “she’s great!
Cute, a bit shy, nothing to hate."
I see it running through their heads,
That’s how it goes with guys I know.
But with time, soon, I lose them all,
My friends alike, they go, they fall
Into the depths of Nothingness.
What is wrong with me to warrant exodus?
Sure, I have issues, I feel love and pain,
Some things I’ve experienced I’ve vowed never again.
I’m a work in progress, the past it still hurts,
But look how far I’ve come: Observe!
The old me would keep on running scared
Keep hounding friends, keep feeling impaired.
But no more, I care way too much
To hurt a friend, to lose so much.
Please tell me, what am I doing wrong?
There is no handbook, I’m struggling on my own
To figure out how to be a friend, how to
Step back at times, yet be there still.
But losing you just hurts too much.
Why did you go, when you mean so much?
But perhaps therein the answer lies
But still it hurts, and still I cry.
Cuz feelings aside, you were my friend
You did for me what no one else did.
I try in turn to give something back
So please, have faith, don’t turn your back...
Cute, a bit shy, nothing to hate."
I see it running through their heads,
That’s how it goes with guys I know.
But with time, soon, I lose them all,
My friends alike, they go, they fall
Into the depths of Nothingness.
What is wrong with me to warrant exodus?
Sure, I have issues, I feel love and pain,
Some things I’ve experienced I’ve vowed never again.
I’m a work in progress, the past it still hurts,
But look how far I’ve come: Observe!
The old me would keep on running scared
Keep hounding friends, keep feeling impaired.
But no more, I care way too much
To hurt a friend, to lose so much.
Please tell me, what am I doing wrong?
There is no handbook, I’m struggling on my own
To figure out how to be a friend, how to
Step back at times, yet be there still.
But losing you just hurts too much.
Why did you go, when you mean so much?
But perhaps therein the answer lies
But still it hurts, and still I cry.
Cuz feelings aside, you were my friend
You did for me what no one else did.
I try in turn to give something back
So please, have faith, don’t turn your back...
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Life is a game of balance
Life is a game of balance, a kind of magic yin yang ball.
A contrasting landscape of good and bad, large and small,
Kind deeds and unkind actions.
Your actions today affect your tomorrow, whether through life or karma --perhaps directed by G-d, or perhaps encompassing the definition of G-d Himself...for to personify G-d is to be human. Which G-d is not.
Life is both a game of opposites and a field of magnetic attraction.
Too much good, and bad will ensue, too much bad, and something good is bound to happen. Unless the ball drops, malfunctions, and skips your turn. This can sometimes happen...for better or for worse. Such instances are not justifiable, they just are.
But see how the opposites come into play?
Attraction too plays a role in life, the idea of karma, “you get what you give”, “what goes around comes around”, and all that jazz.
Strangely enough, this does seem to be the case, more often than not.
But how can rules of opposites and attractions coexist? Perhaps the rule of opposites IS the alpha rule, for this very scenario it explains.
Thus life is formed of opposites
Coexisting
Interacting
In all spheres: life forms, life occurrences, universal happenings.
Opposites provide balance, choices, completion, for nothing is complete without its counterpart.
Man and woman, light and dark, sea and air, life and death: our world has meaning based on comparisons, complements, contrasts.
And balance is perhaps the core of our entire world and universe, though the extent to which we can control this balance (if we would even want to) is unclear.
But there, in that unclear zone, controlling the balance of the universe and its creatures, is G-d.
However you want to describe G-d, for His/Her/Hiser very nature defies human comprehension.
What does it mean to be human?
To not be divine, to not be animals without a conscience, to not be fish. We are what we are not, and we are what we are, so we are indeed contradictions in ourselves.
But G-d and the universe wouldn’t have it any other way.
A contrasting landscape of good and bad, large and small,
Kind deeds and unkind actions.
Your actions today affect your tomorrow, whether through life or karma --perhaps directed by G-d, or perhaps encompassing the definition of G-d Himself...for to personify G-d is to be human. Which G-d is not.
Life is both a game of opposites and a field of magnetic attraction.
Too much good, and bad will ensue, too much bad, and something good is bound to happen. Unless the ball drops, malfunctions, and skips your turn. This can sometimes happen...for better or for worse. Such instances are not justifiable, they just are.
But see how the opposites come into play?
Attraction too plays a role in life, the idea of karma, “you get what you give”, “what goes around comes around”, and all that jazz.
Strangely enough, this does seem to be the case, more often than not.
But how can rules of opposites and attractions coexist? Perhaps the rule of opposites IS the alpha rule, for this very scenario it explains.
Thus life is formed of opposites
Coexisting
Interacting
In all spheres: life forms, life occurrences, universal happenings.
Opposites provide balance, choices, completion, for nothing is complete without its counterpart.
Man and woman, light and dark, sea and air, life and death: our world has meaning based on comparisons, complements, contrasts.
And balance is perhaps the core of our entire world and universe, though the extent to which we can control this balance (if we would even want to) is unclear.
But there, in that unclear zone, controlling the balance of the universe and its creatures, is G-d.
However you want to describe G-d, for His/Her/Hiser very nature defies human comprehension.
What does it mean to be human?
To not be divine, to not be animals without a conscience, to not be fish. We are what we are not, and we are what we are, so we are indeed contradictions in ourselves.
But G-d and the universe wouldn’t have it any other way.
Friday, January 1, 2010
What If I'd Been Born a Mouse?
What if I’d been born a mouse?
Living in my little house,
A bed of grass, a bit of cheese,
A big blue sky, that’s all I’d need.
And what if I was made a wolf,
Running with my pack, aloof?
Whether alpha, beta, I don’t know,
But I know I’d never be alone.
And if a wild horse I’d been
Would I have come back home again?
Or kept on racing with my friends
The world so big, it has no end?
A chipmunk too, I’d like to be,
I’d stuff my cheeks with nuts, you’d see,
And scamper quickly to my lair
And store them for the winter there.
But even though these things I’m not,
I learn from them, they’ve taught me much.
Animals don’t judge, they live for now,
I feel close to them, need them around.
Living in my little house,
A bed of grass, a bit of cheese,
A big blue sky, that’s all I’d need.
And what if I was made a wolf,
Running with my pack, aloof?
Whether alpha, beta, I don’t know,
But I know I’d never be alone.
And if a wild horse I’d been
Would I have come back home again?
Or kept on racing with my friends
The world so big, it has no end?
A chipmunk too, I’d like to be,
I’d stuff my cheeks with nuts, you’d see,
And scamper quickly to my lair
And store them for the winter there.
But even though these things I’m not,
I learn from them, they’ve taught me much.
Animals don’t judge, they live for now,
I feel close to them, need them around.
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